Incompetent Abroad: L’envoi (not to be confused with Lawnboy)
I’ve lived on this luxury liner longer than I’ve held most jobs.
Read MoreIncompetent Abroad: When My Ship Comes In
I’ve got to tell you, the voyage really is the bee’s knees, the top drawer, the penthouse suite, the crème de la crème of easy living.
Read MoreIncompetent Abroad: Losing the Panties
We have seen years go by without the sudden appearance of even a single pair of unsolicited panties.
Read MoreIncompetent Abroad: A Roundup of Cultural Clashes
It’s time to bring you up to date on the events and encounters that don’t fit neatly into a straight chronological narrative.
Read MoreIncompetent Abroad: Bread Pudding and Stonehenge
While I could dispense with London, albeit reluctantly, I just had to see Stonehenge.
Read MoreIncompetent Abroad: After 54 Years, Oxford at Last
Falling back on the instinct that has betrayed me since birth, I decided to give an honest answer.
Read MoreIncompetent Abroad: Do Not Go Gentle into That Gift Shop
Swansea is not, I soon discover, the quaint little fishing village I imagined.
Read MoreIncompetent Abroad: The British Invasion
I would have fallen to my knees and kissed the ground, but I didn’t know who it had been with the night before.
Read MoreIncompetent Abroad: Luxury Cabin Fever
I look out on the same waves and the same cloud patterns that have taunted me since our departure
Read MoreIncompetent Abroad: Life at Sea
My most exotic journeys have been to Lima, Ohio and Owensboro, Kentucky.
Read MoreIncompetent Abroad: The Departure
We stepped onto an escalator and ascended to the main deck of the fabled craft.
Read MoreIncompetent Abroad: The Preparation
Our ship departs Brooklyn Harbor on Tuesday, April 26. Already I feel the earth slipping away.
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